May 18th, 2012

Joke #00200

From the Week of May 7th, 2012:
Dominos this week announced plans to start selling gluten-free pizza. So get ready to learn that the problem wasn’t gluten.

May 18th, 2012

Joke #00199

From the Week of May 7th, 2012:
New research suggests that drinking red wine can help keep a person’s skin and muscles young and fresh. The research also showed that drinking white wine just makes you look cheap.

May 17th, 2012

Joke #00198

From the Week of May 7th, 2012:
In a new interview James Cameron says that the only movies he plans on making from now on are documentaries and sequels to Avatar. America has announced that they only plan on seeing half of those choices.

May 17th, 2012

Joke #00197

From the Week of May 7th, 2012:
Two men this week filed a 2 million dollar federal lawsuit against John Travolta alleging that the actor groped them and tried to force a sexual encounter during a private massage at a hotel in Atlanta. Travolta claims that he only told the masseuse that he wanted to “hand JIVE.”

May 17th, 2012

Joke #00196

From the Week of May 7th, 2012:
Producers of the AMC series Mad Men had to pay 250,000 dollars for the rights to use the Beatles’ song “Tomorrow Never Knows” in a recent episode. Although that sounds like a lot, it’s nothing compared to the price of using a Beatles song that people would recognize.

May 16th, 2012

Joke #00195

From the Week of May 7th, 2012:
A new study shows that 79 percent of married couples who separate will continue on to get a divorce. The other 21 percent are brought back together by their scheming twin daughters.

May 16th, 2012

Joke #00194

From the Week of May 7th, 2012:
A new report lists the US as the 25th best place in the world to be a mother, which is up from 31st place last year. In last place again this year: a high school prom.

May 16th, 2012

Joke #00193

From the Week of May 7th, 2012:
Mitt Romney on Tuesday criticized President Obama saying that the country is not going “forward, but sideways or worse,” though some would say that’s better than Romney’s plan to move the country backwards to 1890.

May 15th, 2012

Joke #00192

From the Week of May 7th, 2012:
A federal judge this week ruled in favor of Victor Willis, from the Village People, in his effort to regain control of the rights to their hit song “YMCA” from two publishing companies. That’s the way the court systems work in this country: always siding with the cops.

April 27th, 2012

I’m very happy with how this article came out. Check it out.

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@ramsobot

Ramsey Ess is a writer and comedian living in Brooklyn. He is a weekly columnist on old TV for Splitsider, podcaster, and a freelance writer for television.

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